Take Care
by MrsJasperHale69
Summary: Set in New Moon Bella's abandoned, and Jacob is the only person she can turn to, who accepts her for what she has become. And Jacob just wants to take care of his best friend. Bella x Jacob. Lemons. Oneshot.


_**Hey guys, I'm back! I decided to take a little time off writing fanfiction because of my gorgeous baby who is taking up so much of my time! I promise to contribute to the Twilight fanfic base once a while :D I still have a few ideas that I'd like to explore with you guys.**_

_**So this is my first Bella/Jake fanfic, although to be honest I was a 100% canon pairings gal when I first discovered the world of Twilight fanfiction. But I caught about 15 minutes of New Moon the other day on Foxtel and this idea came to me out of the blue! So don't forget to REVIEW and tell me what you think, or send me a private line if you'd prefer :D I've missed you guys!**_

_**Enjoy xx**_

_**~ MrsJasperHale69**_

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, or the Twilight franchise. Unfortunately, Steph beat me to it I just make them play with each other :D**

I let my truck slow to a standstill on the curb. This street was familiar to me; I'd been here so many times after all. The little red house, set back into the trees of the forest was also a calming sight for my dark-shadowed eyes. I took a deep breath, feeling the ragged hole permanently burnt into my chest struggle to contain the air I was forcing into it. It hurt, just like every other time I tried to breathe. Everything hurt me now. I took my keys out of the engine, letting the weight of them fall into my lap as I attempted to gather myself before I had to fake it for another few hours. Glancing in the rear-view mirror, I straightened up, brushed my hair off my face, pinched my cheeks to bring some resemblance of colour into them, and forced my mouth into a lame excuse for a smile. This would have to do, I thought to myself as I pinched my cheeks some more. I had to look human for Jacob. I had to look alive. These days I was so pale it was almost as if I were…

There it was again.

The hole in my chest felt as though it had been ripped apart once more. Pain flooded through me, just as the realisation slapped me in the face again. No matter how many times I thought about it… talked about it… dreamt about it… it still hurt me just as bad as when he had told me himself that he was leaving. Leaving me forever. Leaving me alone.

Somehow, the strongest part of my mind forced me to climb out of my truck, my arms still wrapped tight around my ribs in an effort to keep myself together. I crossed the road, barely glancing for traffic. Perhaps some darker part of my mind half hoped that I would be killed. At least then I wouldn't feel this pain inside me anymore. I suppose I'd be free to roam this world as a ghost, or a spirit, or whatever other supernatural being also existed in the world. After all, my friend was a werewolf, and the love of my life was a…

Damn it.

Unconsciously digging my elbows tighter into the aching cavern that was once my chest, I walked up the long path to Jake's door, I make another attempt at forcing an even and believable smile onto my face. It wasn't worth it to see Jakes disappointed look, knowing how much I was hurting on the inside. The hardest thing next to this pain was hiding my emotions from my best friend, no matter how much it killed me.

"Bella!" Billy called as he wheeled himself to the front door. It swung open, allowing me into the small but comfortably cosy living room of the Black residence.

"Hey Billy, how are you?" I asked, trying to infuse a little feeling into my monotonous voice.

"Fine, fine. Yourself?" he looked at me meaningfully.

"Great. Where's Jake?" I changed the topic, glancing eagerly towards Jakes tiny bedroom situated at the back of the house.

"He's out running with the pack. He shouldn't be long."

"Oh. Okay. Should I wait in my truck?" I asked. This was awkward. I didn't want to be left alone with Billy. I liked him, and I trusted him, but conversation no longer came easy for me. And there was always the way that his dark bottomless eyes stared into mine as if he knew exactly what I was scared of, what I was running from. And just maybe, why I was using his son.

"You can wait in his room, he's on his way back now," he muttered good-naturedly, before wheeling himself back to the television and changing the channel. I could feel his eyes tracing my movement as I made my way slowly towards his room and shut the door behind myself.

This was not the first time I had been in Jacob's room, but this was the first time I had the motivation to actually take it in. My first reaction was that Jake was messy. His bed was unmade, and at least 3 shirts and 5 sets of shorts were strewn at random about the room. But perhaps this was normal for a teenage boy. After all, I'd never been in any normal teenage boy's room before, so what did I know? Maybe I was conditioned to expect perfection.

At the tiny desk propped up against the far wall stood a picture frame that glinted with tiny rubies embedded within the gilt frame. Taking a closer look, I noticed that the picture was of Jake and me. From the looks of it, I was about 12 meaning that Jake would have been about 10. We were sitting in the tree at the front of Charlie's house. It must have been a Forks summer for me. Jake looked so young and immature, his shoulder length hair had blown around his face in the picture, but his dark eyes stared intently into the camera still.

I gasped when I saw my own face. I almost didn't recognise it. My hair was short, barely longer then Jacobs. If I remembered correctly, that was as a result of my harebrained mothers attempt at a home haircut to save money. But my face is what truly entranced me. My skin was pale, as always, but so smooth. My fingers unconsciously moved to the patch of skin between my eyes where there always seemed to be a crease of worry this last year. But in the photo, my skin was taut and clear. My eyes were awake, wide, and vivid in their deep brown hue. My hair, although chopped roughly around my shoulders, was glossy and thick and alive. My cheeks were flushed; no doubt as a result of hanging around in trees, and my lips were stained bright pink. I looked so young, carefree, and buzzing with potential. When I was 12, I believed I could do anything.

I set the picture down, my mind processing just how much I had changed. Unwillingly, I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror next to Jake's desk. I didn't want to look at the monster I had become, but I couldn't tear my eyes away. My skin was drawn, tight, and grey. I had lost weight, which was obvious. My eyes were overwhelmed by the purple bags that balanced grimly beneath them, as a product of not being able to sleep for a full eight hours without being woken by a horrific nightmare full of abandonment and rejection. I looked, for all intents and purposes, like a vampire. Except I was not beautiful. I looked like someone had mopped the floor with my head.

The click of the door swinging open pulled me from my swamp of self-loathing.

"Jake!" I cried, but my voice cracked, still haunted by my earlier thoughts.

"Bella, I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner. I was patrolling the borders with Sam, keeping an eye out for the red-haired one." He stepped lithely over the pile of clothes all over his floor and pulled me into his arms, crushing me to his bare hot chest.

"That's okay. I missed you, Jake." I whispered into his chest. For once I wasn't lying. I did miss my best friend. Moments I spent with him fixing up the bikes or going for walks on the beach, or sharing stories, I always managed to keep the hole in my chest closed. If I spent long enough with him, I managed to hold off the pain long enough for the hole to begin to clot, to heal, to scar. But every second I was away from him, it threatened to tear back open.

"I'm glad. I missed you too. Did you want to work on the bikes again?" he directed the question into my hair, still squeezing me in his hard-muscled arms.

"Whatever you want to do, I just need to spend time with my friend today. The hole is hurting me today, Jake. I need you to distract me." I whimpered, one of my hands squeezing between our bodies to claw at the gap in my chest.

He pulled back, held me by the shoulders at arm's length so that he could look into my eyes.

"You okay, Bella? You sure you want to do work today. We could always just talk."

"No. Talking makes it worse. I have to ignore it for it to go away."

He nodded, clearly unsure whether he should take my word for it or not, and we walked hand in hand to the garage where he had stowed the bikes I'd bought for the both of us.

I couldn't hide my shock when I laid eyes on them. It had been a week at least since I was last in this garage with Jake. I liked our meetings to be closer together, but school and Charlie were cracking down on me. From the looks of things, either Jake had a very slack teacher, or he was failing all his subjects, because the bikes had been rebuilt to their former glory. They stood side-by-side, glimmering enticingly in the dim winter sun that shone weakly through the garage door.

"Jake, don't bother lying to me. Have you been spending _any_ time on your school work? How did you get this done so fast?" I stammered, admiring his work but also feeling as though the mature side of me should be scolding him for laying off of school.

He laughed, a warm sound that resonated deep in his throat.

"Relax Bella. I spend plenty of time on school, ask Billy. I'm a straight A student, trust me. Well, straight B's to be exact," he smiled, dropping my hand as he walked over to grasp the handlebars of the first bike which gleamed red.

"This one is yours. It's almost done. I just need to put on new tires. The old ones were entirely bald. If I'm letting you on the open road with this thing, I have to make it as safe as possible."

"It's a motorcycle, Jake. It's not supposed to be safe. That's part of the fun, isn't it?" I smiled at the expression on his face.

"I'll be damned if I let anything happen to you," he growled quietly as if he didn't want me to hear it. I gave up, shrugging, and allowed myself to perch on an overturned milk crate and settled in, ready to watch Jake work away on our bikes for another day.

We didn't say much; words didn't need to be exchanged between the two of us. All we could hear was the sound of the rain hammering on the garage roof, and the occasional howl of a wolf as they ran gleefully throughout the forest, revelling in the moisture that fell through the thick leafy canopy of the woods.

At lunch, we ordered pizza and I pretended to put away three slices, while secretly spitting two of them into the napkin in my lap. Eating was hard without Edward. I managed a small breakfast and dinner because Charlie was constantly watching me. But lunch I could do without. It only gave me something to vomit when the pain came back to me. Luckily for me, Jacob wasn't as observing as Edward, and my plan went unnoticed by him as he scoffed down the rest of the pizza in a few minutes.

"I'm going up to the house to wash my hands," I told Jake, exiting the shed and making my way to the back door of his house. I froze in my footsteps when I saw the police cruiser sitting out the front of his house, pulled up in the driveway. Shit. Charlie was here, and the voice in my head immediately went into panic mode. What did Charlie know? Was he here about the bikes? Would he confiscate them? Tell Billy? Would Jake get into trouble? Guilt filled my heart. This really wasn't his fault. I corrupted him in my quest to be fearless, to be the kind of woman that Edward might want. Might need.

Glum, I entered the house, not bothering to be quiet.

"Jake? Is that you?" I heard Billy's voice call from the kitchen.

"No, it's Bella," I replied, keeping my voice cool and pleasant as I entered the kitchen. Charlie was learning against the counter, and acknowledged my presence with a smile and a nod. Good. If he knew about the bikes, there would be no smiling and nodding. Stabbing, maybe. I relaxed, accidentally breathing deeply until the hole ached and stretched in my chest.

"Hey Dad. What's up?" I tried, once I had recovered, to appear nonchalant as if I was used to my father turning up in unexpected places. I shouldn't be surprised. He was, after all, a cop. And I was so accident prone that he probably considered it a conflict of interest _not_ to follow me every hour of the day to ensure my safety.

"Nothing much. I was just about to take Billy out for some fishing, actually. The fish are biting real mean just north, did you know. I was talking to Webber at the station and he told me that his brother caught 32 big ones, all within 4 hours. You up for it?"

"Am I ever!" Billy grinned. "Two seconds, I'll just grab my lines," he muttered before wheeling himself into the hallway.

"What are you doing here anyway, Bella," Charlie asked me, setting down his coffee cup by the sink and hoisting his bag over his shoulder.

"Just talking with Jake, you know. The usual. Had pizza for lunch. Might go down to the beach later."

"The beach? It's freezing outside. You'd better not get sick, Bella." A frown creased his forehead. With a jolt I realised it matched mine perfectly.

"I'm not swimming, Dad. It's just nice air out there. It's fresh and makes me feel better, that's all." I reasoned with him.

He smiled, nodded his head the way that all Dads did.

"Okay. I'm happy for you, Bella. For a long time I worried that you'd never come back. Yet here you are. No longer zombie girl."

I cringed at his nickname for my catatonic days.

Billy called from the front door.

"Hey, Bella, tell Jake not to wait up. He doesn't have to make dinner; we'll eat what we catch on the beach, alright?"

"Sure thing!" I called back.

"Have fun at the beach, honey," Charlie farewelled me as he zipped up his jacket. "I'm happy you're spending so much time with Jake now. He's good for you. He makes you come alive again." He squeezed my shoulder playfully before he left the kitchen, the front door swinging shut behind him.

"I was always alive; I don't know what you're talking about!" I called after him, but his answering chuckle was lost in the wind.

"That took a while. Are you cheating on me?" Jake asked jokingly as I re-entered the garage a good 15 minutes later then I intended to. I wrinkled my nose. Without saying a word I dropped onto the milk crate.

"What took so long?" he continued, not letting me revel in the silence. I was so stressed, so scared that Jake would get into trouble that for the first time in a long time I realised that I wasn't thinking of Edward at all.

I shook myself out of my reverie.

"Billy's gone fishing with Charlie. He says to not bother with dinner," I mumbled, my mind still reeling with the idea that I was able to diffuse thoughts of my pain elsewhere for the smallest moment of time. While it wasn't long enough to allow the hole to close over, it at least allowed the raw edges to numb a little.

Jake nodded his head at my explanation.

"I love you, Bella."

His voice was soft, breathy in the noisy garage. At first, I didn't even realise he had said anything, as his eyes were focussed solely on the red bike he had just put new tires on. I was happy that I was imagining things, rather than having to face this emotional upheaval right now. But my doubt evaporated when his eyes left the bike to stare deeply into mine. My eyes averted immediately. I still found it hard to make eye contact ever since he left. I was afraid that allowing someone access to the windows of my soul might make them realise that there was no soul left inside me. Edward had taken it, no matter how resistant he was to the idea, when he deserted me the way he did. That was why I was torn. Part of me was missing.

"I love you," he repeated, and I couldn't ignore the frustrated tone in his voice as he stood up, wiping his greasy hands against the rag hanging over the handlebars of the bike. I still stared pointedly in the other direction. Jake knew that I loved him platonically, I told him often enough. I didn't want to be forced into having a conversation about an emotion that had been ripped from my centre months earlier. As far as romantic love went, I no longer had any to give.

I didn't notice that he'd walked towards me, crouching down in front of me although his head was still a good 2 feet higher than mine, even when he was on the floor.

"I love you."

It was a hard statement. A fact. Not at all a question, or a request. He wasn't asking me to love him back, he was demanding it.

"Goddamn it!" he yelped, standing up so abruptly that I jumped in fright. With incredible strength he threw the spanner that he was holding in one hand so forcefully towards the wall of the garage that it left a deep dent in the reinforced wall.

"I hate this!" he cried, storming away from me to retrieve the spanner before setting it down just as angrily with his other tools.

"What?" I whimpered, almost silent. I didn't trust my voice at this moment.

"I hate him! That dirty fucking bloodsucker!"

My chest burnt with newfound agony as these words left his mouth.

"Look what you've become because of him. You're a shell, Bella. Empty and useless and fragile. You've changed. You're not my Bella anymore. You're some kind of monster!" he fumed, throwing his tools into the toolbox without taking his burning eyes off of mine.

"I was _never _'your' Bella," I reminded him, but my voice held no threat or meaning. It was flat and monotonous as always.

"No, you weren't. You let yourself become so infatuated with that monster that you forgot how to survive on your own. You can't even pretend that you're okay for Charlie's wellbeing. It's pathetic. He needs his daughter, and all that you have to offer him is this sad excuse for a girl. Where's your soul, Bella? Where did you go?"

"I… I'm right here, Jake."

He grimaced, shaking his head hard.

"No. You're not. Your body is here, but your mind isn't. Because if you were even half sane, the Bella I used to hang out with when we were little, who used to exchange homemade gifts with me every year, who used to be my best friend… well, you'd realise how good I am for you."

"Jake, you _are_ my best friend. And I know that you're good for me…"

"It's not my job to heal your broken heart, Bella. You've known me since we were children. We shared our secrets. And now you're so hidden from me. It's like we're strangers. You only knew Edward for a matter of months, and it's like you've lost the love of your life."

"I did, Jake. How can you not understand that?" I cried, impatient now.

"How can he be the love of your life? He _left _you, Bella. How can someone love you if they allow you to hurt like that? And now I've got to put the pieces back together, and yet still you mourn him like he's the greatest thing to ever happen to you! When will you see that he hurt you, Bella. Stop idolising someone who doesn't give a damn about you!"

Those words stung, and I blinked back tears before I answered.

"Please, Jake. Just be my friend right now. He hurt me, and-"

"I would _never_ hurt you, Bells. Never. I'm not the only person in the world who can fight for you. I haven't slept in days because I've been chasing Victoria out of Washington every time she comes anywhere close. And the second I get a chance, I'll kill her. I tore Laurent apart that day in the meadow. I make sacrifices for you every day, and you don't even see it. All you can think of is your beloved bloodsucker. He doesn't care about you. But I do."

I was stunned.

Jake was right.

Edward had left me here, unprotected just as Laurent had told me.

I was a pet of theirs, and they abandoned me to fend for myself in a world filled with creatures that for most people existed only in fairytales and movies.

I was a weak human, ageing every day, who could barely walk down a flight of steps without falling. I was defenceless.

Edward Cullen had left me here to die.

The hole in my chest burnt painfully as I comprehended all of the information that Jake was giving me.

Noticing my silence, he stalked towards me and knelt in front of me once more, one of his massive hands taking mine. It was warm. I had missed feeling warm.

"Do you really believe that after knowing me for so long, that loving me would be hard? You know I would protect you better than he ever did. There are going to be 10 wolves in our pack once Quil joins in the fun. You'll never go unprotected,"

I sat in silence, mesmerised by the realisation that the hole in my chest should be hurting right now, burning and tugging at my heart and my lungs. But it wasn't.

"I would never leave you, Forks is my home. You wouldn't have to change anything for me. I would love you every day and keep you warm. We could grow old together in a way that you never could with Edward. You'd never have to say goodbye to Charlie and your friends. Can't you imagine a life with me, Bella?"

And in truth, I could.

The thought of a life with Jake had been lingering in my mind ever since we started hanging out together. Jake was easy to please. He made me forget about Edward. He loved me unconditionally despite the fact that I did not love him back.

But some part of me, the deepest part of my conscience that I never realised existed, told me that I did love him.

He was, after all, the only person left in this world that I could tell all of my thoughts and secrets to without having me committed to an asylum. He understood my reason for being such a zombie. But he still wanted to make me happy, despite all of that.

"I could love you." My voice was barely audible, it was mostly to myself. The realisation hit me like a ton of bricks. Would Edward mind? Would I care if he did? He must have expected me to love another at some point in my life if he planned on never coming back for me, although he probably did not think that it would be a dog.

"That's good enough for now," he whispered, a smile finally gracing his beautiful russet skin. He seemed relieved that I seemed to have taken his side in the argument instead of remaining stubborn and steadfast in my loyalty to Edward.

And before realising what I was doing, or why I was doing it, I was kissing him.

Warm. So warm.

This kiss wasn't full of unrequited love and passion, and fuelled with lust and romance. It was soft, teasing. We were testing the waters of a whole new level of intimacy.

His lips were soft and hot against mine, a pleasant change.

The rain continued to pummel down angrily upon the tin roof of the shed, filling the air with the smell of new rain and damp earth. But Jacob was filling my senses. He didn't smell at all sweet like Edward and his family did. His scent was oaky, wild, mixed with the fragrances of forest flora. It captivated me as our lips continued moving against one another, feeling, tracing, tasting.

"I love you, Bella Swan," Jake murmured against my lips, pulling back from me just enough to capture my eyes with his. For the first time in months, looking into someone's eyes did not hurt me. I revelled in the sensation.

"I love you, Jacob Black," I replied. I was sure of the words, even before I said it. For once in a dark and painful stretch of time, I was not lying about my feelings. I did love him. I did.

Before I had time to celebrate my confession, Jake's hand reached up to tangle through my long and knotted curls, pulling my head back just enough so that his lips could begin their descent down my neck, exploring new skin, kissing and nipping and sucking on the erogenous zones that Edward was too scared to find. I couldn't hold back the gasp as the sensation of his hot wet mouth on my neck, fearless and playful. This was good. So good.

My hands went to his thick black hair, which had just started to grow out of his short cut. I threaded my fingers through and held him to my throat. Why? Perhaps it was an ode to Edward. Jake was willing to kiss me in places that he refused to.

I let out a sigh, giving in to my senses. Before I could reign in my emotions, Jake's arms had lifted me up, my legs automatically wrapping around his waist. Our lips re-locked, more urgent this time. His tongue traced the outside of my bottom lip almost nervously, but I met his with my own without hesitation. My body needed this. It felt good to know that someone wanted me. Our tongues flicked together softly, then harder, thrusting into one another's mouth with a ferocity that surprised me. I wasn't used to being handled this way. Without care. Because Jake wasn't afraid he'd break me.

"Oh, Jake," I sighed, my head lolling back so allow him access to my neck once more.

"Bella, do you want this?" he whispered into my neck, his voice husky and deep with arousal. This was, after all, a dream come true for him. My mind took a second to register his question. What did 'this' even mean. Was this going to stop as soon as it happened? Or did Jacob have no limitations, unlike Edward. Would he not stop until I asked him to, not pull away until he was finished. The thought excited me, and a shiver of the unknown passed down my spine.

"Yes, I do." My answer was short, to the point and concise. That was a good thing, as it didn't seem like Jake could comprehend any complex sentences at the moment. Neither could I. The feeling of having a hot body pressed up against mine, and a sweet-tasting tongue flicking a teasing trail down my neck had dissolved most of my vocabulary as well as most of my common sense.

My answer seemed to please Jake, as without pausing to look where he was going, I suddenly found myself being carried through the rain of Jake's back garden until we reached the door to the kitchen. I was soaked within seconds from the downpour of freezing cold Forks rain, but it didn't cause me to break contact with Jake's lips the entire time. I enjoyed it. Edward would never have let me get soaked in rain. Too careful. Before I knew it, I was in the hallway of his house. I didn't bother interrupting him to ask how we got there so quickly. Desire will do amazing things to a man.

And then my back was up against his bedroom door, my legs around his waist, and my arms around his neck. He pulled away from my lips and leant back, just enough so that he could pull off his soaked shirt. The whole time, his hips held me up against the wall. When his chest moulded back to mine, I felt pure warmth flooding through my body. His skin was hot to touch, feverish, and the feeling of being wrapped up in his heat had me feeling delirious. I needed this, needed him. This was happening. Finally.

Jake's hands traced patterns lightly on the exposed skin in between the end of my shirt and the start of my jeans. His hands were quick, feather-light, teasing. I felt his hesitation to undress me. He was afraid of frightening me, of making me do something I didn't want to, of making a mistake that would end this downpour of passion.

My hands left my spot around his neck and moved to pull my wet shirt over my head. His face showed the pure joy that he experienced, just knowing that I was doing this of my own free will and wanting.

"You can touch me if you want to," I whispered softly into his shoulder. My permission encouraged him to no end. His hands left their supportive position on my waist and reached up to hold my breasts, squeezing hard and watching my creamy white skin threaten to overfill the cups. His mouth hurried to kiss every inch of skin he could reach, as if it was only a matter of time before I would pull away, make my excuses, and leave him high and dry.

But not this time.

I was going to give as good as I got.

My lips somehow found his as his hands pushed off the wall and headed straight for the bed. He threw me across it, a little rougher than I was used to, but I allowed myself to enjoy the spontaneity of this tryst. Before I knew it, he was on top of me, his hot body pressed against every inch of my pale skin. His hands wandering fearlessly and fast over my skin; running over my heaving breasts to my quivering belly. I managed to snake one hand behind me to unfasten by bra, flinging it to the other side of the room. Immediately his mouth came down to meet my erect nipples, his tongue circling them feverishly and biting down hard enough to make me squirm in pleasure.

"Jake… Jake… oh God, Jake," I moaned, my fingers clenching in his thick hair. His heat soaked through me, warming me up for the first time in months. I wrapped my arms around his chest, trying to squeeze him to me as hard as possible, wanting to absorb every inch of his tantalising heat and intoxicating smell.

He wrenched open the button of my jeans so violently that it pinged off and landed somewhere in the corner of his room, his hands pulling my jeans off my legs. His fingers twisted around the waistband of my panties, his eyes meeting mine once more, silently pleading for my permission to finish what we had started. I barely had enough focus to nod my head quickly, wanting him to hurry along with this teasing.

"Thank God," I heard him murmur, as with a rip my panties were discarded, ruined, somewhere in the vicinity of my jeans.

My hands went to find him, to pull him up to me so that we could seal the deal, cement this friendship into something much more tangible and permanent. But all too quickly, his hot mouth was on that part of me that make me cry out instantaneously.

"Oh my God!" I cried, my hand abandoning its futile mission and clamping itself over my mouth to keep from crying out again. I could feel his tongue lapping up the juices that he had coaxed from my body, before it started flicking against my oversensitive clit, faster and faster. Unconsciously my hips began to grind against his mouth, the feeling of his tongue teasing me endlessly brought me closer and closer to the precipice. It was coming. The unfamiliar feeling was growing, multiplying and dividing in the bottom of my stomach. My hips gyrated furiously, my eyes closed, my toes clenched and with one expert flick of his tongue, I was gone.

I registered screaming, and wondered why I was not worried that someone might be near, that we might be caught in a very compromising position. That was when I realised that it was me who was screaming. I opened my eyes; fairy lights filled my vision as my eyesight readjusted. Jake was leaning on his forearms, his head resting on my stomach, looking up at me with a very satisfied look on his face.

"Fuck. That was awesome to watch," he grinned, winking coyly at me. I flushed with embarrassment, almost angry that I was feeling this way.

"Fine. You're going to make fun of me right now?" I bit my lip, trying not to cry. Fuck. Since when have I ever cried? I didn't even cry when Edward left. Hated myself? Yes. Sank into a depressive coma? Sure did. Yelled and screamed? Lots of it. But cry? Never. I just didn't have that gene.

"I didn't mean to. I meant it. You looked amazing. It's just that I've never done that before, so I'm glad to see that I seem to have a natural talent for it," he smirked, before placing a soft kiss right on top of my clit, making my whole body twitch.

"Not to mention how delicious you smell. I also seem to have a talent for making you soaking wet now, don't I?" he asked, his finger slowly tracing my slit before bringing it up to his mouth to suck off my juices. Fuck that was hot.

"And you taste just as delicious as you smell, by the way," he added, watching my attempts to pull him up my body.

"Would you like me to fuck you, Bella?" he asked, the words sounding strange coming from his innocent mouth. But I was horny beyond belief. I needed him.

"Yes, please, Jake. I need to feel you… i-inside me," I stammered nervously. Ugh. Obviously talking dirty was not a sexual gift that I had in my arsenal.

Jake didn't seem to mind.

"Ok."

Before I could register the reality of the situation, he'd unzipped his jeans to reveal his erect cock, roughly 9 inches and visibly throbbing for my touch. I reached my hand out tentatively, squeezing the base and hearing him hiss.

"Sorry!" I mumbled, releasing my grip.

"No, Bella, it was good. But I don't want to come like that," he murmured softly, his hands brushing my hair out of my face. His hands grasped my hips and pulled me down the bed towards him. I let out a hiss of my own as he drew the tip of his cock up and down my slick folds, coating it in my juices. Every time it slid over my clit I gasped and bucked my hips upwards. He laughed at my efforts.

"Patience, Bella," he smiled at me. And without further ado, he slid his cock into my tight, wet body.

It was a feeling I'd never experienced before. I had no idea what to expect of this whole 'losing your virginity shenanigan' that all the girls in high school gossiped about. I'd heard all the horror stories of course, usually courtesy of Jessica's "friend of a friend of a cousin" who knew quite a lot of sexually misfortunate people. Stories of how a girl bled for weeks, or was so painful that she couldn't walk or sit for 3 days afterwards. But I had never needed to worry about tall tales like this. In my mind, virginity was something else Edward refused to touch upon, so there was no need to think on it. But this was nothing like Jessica described. There was no tearing, no crying, no pain and no horror.

There was just perfection.

The unfamiliar sensation of having Jake buried deep inside me only succeeded in filling me with a warmth I have ever known. For the first time in weeks… months… I felt hot. Almost sweaty. I snaked a hand inbetween our chests and gasped. The hole in my chest was not there. Only my pale clammy skin remained under my fingers, translucent but unbroken.

Jake hadn't moved yet. His mouth rested on my forehead, kissing me every few seconds as he let me adjust to his size. Part of me did not agree with this gentlemanly offer. I was tired of being treated like some fragile doll. Curiously, I lifted my hips ever-so-slightly off the bed to meet his, allowing him to slide another inch or so until he was completely inside me. I felt his groan against my hairline.

"Are you ok?" he murmured, his breathing heavy.

"Yes. You can move, Jake."

My words seemed to be exactly what he wanted to hear. With a groan of anticipation he slowly – oh so slowly – withdrew from my body until he was barely inside me. I gasped. The friction was something I could not possibly imagine.

And then with no hesitation, he promptly thrust back inside me. I cried out. I couldn't help it. The cycle continued, each thrust of his hips met by a tilt of mine which caused us to move together in a way that made my whole body shiver.

"Oh Bella," he groaned intermittently between thrusts. I was beyond words. Every time I opened my mouth, all that escaped was a moan so loud I was concerned that everyone in the vicinity would hear it and come to my aid.

Jake buried his face in my neck, deeply inhaling the scent of my skin. His hands moved to either side of my head, holding his torso up so he was no longer squashing me. I was glad he took the initiative – he was a lot heavier then Edward and while I enjoyed his warm weight on top of me, I was starting to suffocate. This move only served to make his biceps bulge as he continued to thrust deeply into my welcoming body.

My hands took advantage of his exposed torso, not wasting any time in exploring each curve of his rippling muscles, his abs, his pecs, and last but not least wrapping around him to grasp his ass, holding him tightly to me as he pounded into me.

"Oh fuck!" I cried out against my will. His pubic bone was rubbing enticingly against my clit with every upwards thrust of my hips against his, and the feeling was building and burning familiarly in the deepest part of my stomach.

Jacob seemed to enjoy the fun fact that he could bring me to cursing, as without warning he sat up, pulling me onto his lap without ceasing his rhythm. With my legs wrapped around his waist, his hands grasped my hips and moved me over his length, ensuring I slid all the way down to the hilt each time. This position allowed Jake to reach a whole new spot inside me that made me literally squeal in pleasure with every upward stroke of his.

"You are so beautiful," he murmured. I opened my eyes to see that this new position also conveniently placed his mouth right in front of my bouncing breasts. He grinned cheekily up at me before leaning in and taking one in his mouth, his other hand coming up to playfully pinch the other.

This was too much.

"Jake…" I murmured, trying not to sound desperate. In all honesty I felt like I was about to explode.

"Mmm" he murmured in reply, his tongue flicking quickly against my nipple like it had my clit earlier.

"I'm going to…" I gasped, the sensations flooding freely through my veins now. This was going to be much more intense than anything I had ever experienced before.

"Yes?" he replied, still preoccupied with my chest.

"You're gonna make me… OH FUCK!" I cried out, my head thrown back. My hips gyrated furiously against his. I could feel it, just out of reach. Jake pulled me to his chest, holding me against him as I rode him, desperate for this release.

"He will never make you feel like this" he whispered into my ear, and then without warning he pulled me off of his body and turned me around, my head facing the headboard of his bed.

I was immediately frustrated. I was so close, and he was pulling away. He reminded me of Edward in moments like this. Before I had time to even register what to say to him, he was inside me again, only this time he was behind me, out of sight, pounding into my body at a rate that I couldn't control. Doggy style. Seemed almost ironic. But I wasn't complaining, because out of the dark place where I thought that wonderful promise of release had been banished, it emerged once more, taking me in its hold and threatening to make me self implode.

My hands braced myself against the wall as his pounding had me literally shimmying up the bed with each forceful thrust.

"Oh my God… Jake that feels so…" my voice cut off, pleasure to intense for my mind to focus on speaking and feeling all at once.

One of his hands gripped my ass almost angrily, the other snaked underneath me to circle my clit.

"He can never fuck you the way I can, Bella."

"Hmph" I murmured, too lost in the feeling to formulate a more English response.

"He'll never get to feel you come around him the way I will,"

His words sent a shiver up my spine.

"You belong to me, now, Bella," he grunted deeply into my ear, his body curved over mine so that my back was flat against his hot chest.

Fuck he felt good inside me. This was it. This was the end. The feeling built up, and up, and up. I started grinding back against his length, using the wall as leverage. Sounds were escaping my lips that weren't really any dialect, just pure pleasure.

"I'm… I'm…"

"Come all over me, Bella," he groaned in my ear, and with those last words playing in my mind, and his fingers circling my clit so fast it seemed impossible, he sank his teeth into my neck.

And that was how I, Bella Swan, died.

Of course, I didn't really die. But what a lovely way to go. I certainly blacked out for a moment or two. When I opened my eyes, Jake was gently placing kisses on the place he had bitten.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realise I bit down so hard. I didn't mean to."

"Huh?" It took my exhausted body a moment to register the throbbing pain emanating from my neck. My fingers moved to gingerly touch it. It felt hot and tender, and I knew that he had probably broken the skin. Sure enough, a light smear of blood coated my fingers when I pulled them away.

"Hope you've had your rabies shot," Jake grinned.

"I hope you're joking," I murmured, my body melting against his as he pulled the covers over our bodies.

"I hope you're immune," he replied, which didn't ease my concerns in the slightest. But I was so tired. I felt Jake kiss my forehead once more.

"You can sleep, Bella."

His words were simple, and they were perfect.

I snuggled up to his chest, allowing his warmth to soak through me, and closed my eyes.

And for the first time in a long time, I slept without dreams.


End file.
